This blog began as my way to express to you what my goals for 2013. That endeavor has evolved into the single most therapeutic outlet I have ever discovered. In the fall of 2012 I found myself in a marriage that left me feeling less appreciated than I have ever felt in my entire life. I chose to be happy which meant I chose to leave. This blog became the sounding board not to blaspheme the concept of marriage but to openly and honestly approach a divorce from a humane angle and to try and vocalize how I found the best way to do that.
This blog has more than adequately served its purpose. I can now say at this point in my life that I not only have a better understanding of what it is I am, but also that my actions are in line with that identity. Now that I am past all of that, I want nothing to do with this blog. The therapy I gained from it was in the process of digging the words out of me and formulating them to the best of my ability. It was that process of creation followed along with how my soul was positively affected by making myself vulnerable in sharing all of this with you. I gathered up my emotional hindrances, purged them, and then allowed sunlight in to disinfect.
I have no right, no ground, no purpose nor benefit in holding on to some bitter resentment for some melodramatically justifiable reason to be angry because it suits me or my situation. I have alleviated more psychological adversity and successfully navigated through more emotional turmoil with writing this year than I could have possible hoped. Yet with all of that ground that I have gained with writing, it was the guidance and encouragement from all of you that made that journey possible.
This may seem like a stretch to reference my son here, but it makes absolute sense to me. When I look at him now, I see a child whose environment is so much healthier because of the perspective I have found through the encouragement from all of you. Our duty as parents is to make our children better than we were. You have helped me raise the bar for myself and, in turn, enabling me to raise the bar for him. No heart can repay that debt, but I will always appreciate it. I will also always lack the words to explain how powerful your support actually is but I know exactly how it feels; a world of a difference. That world is happy and healthy now and you have empowered it to move on. Thank you for that, and understand that you will be a part of that world as it moves on.
